Happy Birthday America

peaceflaggraphic

Peace Flag, image from SoCal Flags, https://www.amazon.com/SoCal-Flags-Polyester-Weather-Resistant/dp/B01CF2THTK

It doesn’t seem that long ago that we were celebrating the Bicentennial and everything was red, white, and blue. Now, 41 years later, we’re having a bit of difficulty getting along with each other, and with the world at large. If America can manage to stay together, I propose we adopt a new version of the Stars and Stripes, one that expresses our most important mission for the 21st century: Peace! Happy Fourth, everyone!

 

 

Proud to Be an Amurrican

In honor of Independence Day, and inspired by Lee Greenwood’s famous song, I’ve written a new patriotic ballad with lyrics appropriate for 2013.

If tomorrow I lost my car and cash in a random traffic stop

And I found myself in prison ’cause I talked back to the cop

Well I wouldn’t dare get angry; I’d have no cause for alarm

Cause the flag means domination, and it’s keeping us from harm

 

Well, I’m proud to be a corporate slave. I’m so happy on my knees

And I’d like to thank the ones who died to make profits for GE

Yes I’d lay my life down so Israel can annex more land today

Cause we’re fighting for democracy and the oil we need to play.

 

From the data mines in Utah to the groping TSA

To the heroes fighting Hadjis in some godforsaken waste

To the clerks who read my emails, so I know that I’ll be safe

Let’s go kill those brown-skinned foreigners

Who all hate us ’cause we’re great!

 

Oh I’m proud to drink the Kool-Aid, and believe what Rush tells me.

I’m so glad Chuck Schumer drops the boom on all who dare to leave

And I’ll meekly shelter inside my home when the mayor tells me to stay

‘Cause they know me better than my mom: God bless the NSA!

 

Copyright 2013 by Vaughn Treude

Permission to republish is hereby granted provided that proper attribution is given.